The Bride That Time Forgot (The Adventures of Brenda and Effie: Book 5)

Paul Magrs
Headline Review

Something is biting people on the streets of Whitby. In an ordinary town, this would be worrying. Here, it's disastrous, and only Brenda has guessed why. She's also trying to prepare for a packed festive break at her B and B. But when unexpected help from the shadows of the past arrives to illuminate the dangers awaiting them all, Brenda realises that unless she can find a way to save Effie, the consequences may be eternal.

So back to Whitby we go where we drop ourselves straight into the aftermath of the return of Alucard and the nibble he took out of Effie's neck at the end of the previous books shenanigans.

Things have not been going well for our favourite crotchety old witch and it's not long before the arrival of Brenda's monster hunting ex beau takes her misery to a whole new level with his stake happy ways.  Mixed in with this you have a cult based around the pulp fantasy novels of Beatrice Mapp based in the matriarchal world of Qab to which Brenda inevitably has long forgotten links.

It was a rollicking good read that didn't let up it's breakneck (or should that be biteneck) speed for a second.  It left things open and full of questions but as there's still another one of these to go in the series so I'm a happy man whose breath is bated.

Buy it here - The Bride That Time Forgot (Brenda 5)

Hell's Belles (The Adventures of Brenda and Effie: Book 4)

Paul Magrs
Headline Review

Penny is running away from a life of domestic strife and into mysterious Whitby - where she hopes to find herself. But in her quest for self-discovery, Penny may have stumbled on something far more sinister: the gateway to hell. For Whitby is no ordinary seaside resort, and all that keeps the evil at bay are Brenda and Effie - two very unusual old ladies. When a film crew comes to town to remake the sixties schlock horror movie Get Thee Inside Me, Satan, Brenda and Effie suspect something strange is afoot. Female lead Karla Sorenson is reprising her role and she doesn't look like she's aged a day. Surely that's not possible? Then there are the disturbing rumours surrounding the original movie - a cult classic that is, quite literally, spell-binding. As events spool out of control, Penny's new boss Robert draws her deeper into the movie's peculiar mystery. But can it be stopped before all hell breaks loose?

And so for the fourth time we venture into the hellish environs of Whitby where Brenda and Effie continue their mission to protect the town from evil.

This time a remake of an old Hammer style horror film comes to town along with its vampish star, Karla Sorenson. Brenda has history with her, and with the original movie, but the old memory is not what it was. Soon Sorenson is bewitching the local men whilst the film, at the behest of dark forces, begins to bring both secrets and old acquaintances or into the open.

I wasn't as absorbed by this one as I was with the others but truthfully I don't think it was the book's fault I was just a little preoccupied. It was fun, silly and very much in the spirit of the others in series. Another gem in a series that has been nothing but gems although maybe this time out it's perhaps more of a midget gem from one of Brenda's bags of pick 'n' mix.

Buy it here - Hell's Belles (Brenda 4)

Conjugal Rights (The Adventures of Brenda and Effie: Book 3)

Paul Magrs
Headline Review

No matter what she tries to do, trouble has a way of finding Brenda. It's hardly surprising with secrets like hers. When her old adversary Mr Danby starts filling the airwaves with his late night phone in show it can only mean one thing - and sure enough best friend Effie soon finds herself up to her neck in it. But that is only the beginning; fate has an even bigger surprise in store. Romance is in the air for Brenda and, do what she will, she cannot deny that she and her man were made for each other - literally. But as usual, Brenda and Effie will face up to whatever dangers come their way with fortitude and grace: even if that means journeying to places beyond their wildest dreams.

This is the third Brenda and Effie and it all kicks off mightily as, thanks to the really rather unpleasant Mrs Claus, Frank's in town and he wants his wife. Brenda's, strong, objections to Frank's insistence on what he sees as his long overdue nuptials sends the two of them quite literally to Hell via a long drop over a large cliff. Effie and Robert are having none of it and soon, with Sheila Manchu in tow, follow her via the Bitches Maw into a Hell that bears an uncanny similarity to the Whitby they'd just left and so, on familiarish ground they soon manage to get back together with Brenda. Things don't necessarily go exactly too well but thanks to Brenda's selflessness the friends, along with Frank and Alucard, escape Hell in a fabulously unorthodox way.

Magrs is a writer with a gloriously silly imagination and the chops to back it up with a series of referential and (ir)reverential stories.

Buy it here - Conjugal Rites (Brenda 3)

Something Borrowed (The Adventures of Brenda and Effie: Book 2)

Paul Magrs
Headline Review

Brenda must face her demons, but first she needs to get to the bottom of the sinister goings-on that threaten to overcome an all-too-quiet seaside town.
When poison pen letters start flying around the quiet lanes of Whitby, trouble is in store for Brenda and Effie. And with Jessie the Zombie Womanzee, trips down memory lane and amorous ghoul hunting, literary minded and strangely youthful professors of Icelandic history, as well as a terrifying encounter with bamboo wickerwork gods from the dawn of time, even Brenda’s ample cup is running over. But her most challenging battle is the one she must fight with herself – or, at least, parts of herself…

This is the second in the continuing adventures of Brenda and Effie as they guard Whitby against nefarious goings on.

As with the previous book in the series there are several short tales embedded within the longer story. In this instance though they serve to provide more insight into Brenda's past and present. We are introduced to one of her ex beaus - a monster hunting Cambridge don and Sheila Manchu - wife of a certain aged (and now deceased) oriental criminal mastermind. These two play central roles in the unfolding menace of an ancient alien bamboo god called Goomba who so desperately wants to go home he's putting everyone under a spell.

As with the first it was a good fun read although it was considerably less gung-ho than it's predecessor.

Buy it here -  Something Borrowed (The Brenda and Effie Mysteries Book 2)

Never The Bride (The Adventures of Brenda and Effie: Book 1)

Paul Magrs
Headline Review

Brenda has had a long and eventful life and she has come to Whitby to run a B&B in search of some peace and quiet. She and her best friend Effie like nothing better than going out for tea at the Walrus and the Carpenter or dinner at Cod Almighty and keeping their eyes open for any of the mysterious goings on in town. And what with satanic beauty salons, more than illegal aliens, roving psychic investigators and the frankly terrifying owner of the Christmas Hotel there are no shortage of nefarious shenanigans to keep them interested. But the oddest thing in Whitby may well be Brenda herself. With her terrible scars, her strange lack of a surname or the fact that she takes two different shoe sizes, Brenda should have known that people as, well, unique as she is, just aren't destined for a quiet life.

Magrs (pronounced Mars) is a Doctor Who writer (amongst other things) and it really shows as this whole book has a lightness and playfulness about it that made it compulsive reading with ideas straight out of the ‘Who’ grab-bag.

The (not a) Bride of the title is named Brenda and is the owner of a B&B in Whitby who, along with her neighbour, junk shop proprietor Effie, investigates strange goings on in her strange little town.  Brenda’s true identity becomes evident very early on in the proceedings and she is slowly revealed to have been ‘guided’ to Whitby to become the guardian of the place against the portal to Hell opened there.

Magrs makes use of War of the Worlds, Most Haunted (one of the most shameful programmes ever to appear on UK television) and Whitby’s most famous visitor and weaves them into the tapestry of Brenda’s world to produce a joyful, rollicking read full of good, old fashioned, unadulterated fun.

Buy it here -  Never the Bride (The Brenda and Effie Mysteries Book 1)